running away. those two words have described my whole life.
boys. mom. dad. friends. boys.
it's so easy. running away.
commitment. that's a word many people run from. especially me. it's scary. and it makes me want to run in a corner and hide. but mostly, do not, by any circumstances, commit to someone, or rather, something, you don't want.
don't settle! right now, part of me wants to settle. but, there's so much more. college. career. boys. ok, maybe not boys. but i want maturity.
that's what i want. maturity. some say, that word is scarier than commitment. ha. i beg to differ. it's my last day from running away.
i came to this school, because i was running away. a year later, i'm still running. but for different reasons and from different people. sometimes, i wish some people would pull their head out of their ass, and take a deep breath. to realize that what they're smelling is something better. not fake. people might like them more. and hopefully a weight is lifted from their burdened chest.
as for me, i just want to be happy. i can say now, i am finally happy with who i am. and i can say yes, the title of this is from the starting line. oops! i am not perfect. i guess the people with their head up their ass are not perfect either.
you can't make everyone happy. yes, i've realized this too. but does it hurt to try?
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7 comments:
I FEEL U IM AFRAID OF COMMITMENT TOO IVE HAD A CRUSH ON THIS GIRL SINCE 6TH GRADE AND SHES DATING A SENIOR IN HIGH SCHOOL :( WE USED TO TALK AND HOLD HANDS IN MOVIES BUT I CANNOT PUSH MYSELF TO COMMIT TO HER BCUZ SHE HAS GOHNORREA AND I DONT WANT TO GET IT I MEAN IM 14 AND I STILL HAVE MY LIFE AHEAD OF ME!!!1!! MAYBE OUR SITUATIONZ AINT THE SAME BUT WE BOTH SHARE A COMMON FEAR AND I THOUGHT UD LIKE TO KNO THEREZ OTHER PPPL OUT THERE LIKE U!!!!!!!!!!!
Well this is a great little piece! I know exactly what you mean. I feel like maturity and commitment to something or someone is the most frightening thing in the world. It seems to final. Even with graduation, it might be two or, maybe more, years away but it seems like bam...grow up.
Okay, I'm putting on my "mom" hat.
Don't try to please everyone. It's impossible. Not because of anything YOU do, but because many people are just wacky. Why torture yourself because of other people's issues?
Wish I would have figured this out about 30 years ago. But it's never too late! :-)
Being mature scares me too, when does it really hit you that your an adult? I feel the same way, like I'm running from what I can do, instead of to it. Hang in there :o)
Good lord. You are ridiculous. Running, commitment, maturity, and immaturity all in one post? Crazy girl. :)
I still can't get over the fact that our Fact sheet in MC 202 today said "Fartknocker road" wtf?!?!
Good thing you came to that realization. Always be happy ith yourself. Im learning that now also.
I totally agree with you too. I run away from everything, especially guys. But at least your learning to be happy with yourself now!!! :)
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